The Paradox! Plans and Realities...waiting for Med school acceptance

When I was 15 I told my parents, "I want to be a doctor."
This was after the dream of being a cartoonist and a dancer had faded. image from www.ucgstp.org


I was graduating from secondary school, and I knew I wanted to work with people, specifically something to do with healing, so I decided, doctor.
Later that october, missionary doctors came to our church. To me, that was a sign. 
My admission to Illinois College soon after and before age 16 was an even bigger sign.

Proverbs 16:3 was in play "Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed."

10 years later, Proverbs 16:9 is in play,
"In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps."
Does this cancel out Prov 16:3? 
I ask myself, "did I not commit those plans to you Lord?" 
and even more perplexing, "did you not give me that desire?"

Then, Jeremiah 29:11*-13 comes to mind, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 
Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 
You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."


This was after God's people had spent SEVENTY years in exile in Babylon...
Did I complain about 10 years! 
Phish, doesn't seem so much after all, Lord, haha 
 please don't make it more...

In the words of Bebo Norman,
I will lift my eyes to the maker of the mountains I can't climb I will lift my eyes to the calmer of the the oceans raging wildI will lift my eyes to the healer of the pain I have inside I will lift my eyes,
lift my eyes
to you...